i either got mauled last night by a velociraptor or an angry lipstick lesbian. could have been both
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Randomize
