And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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