dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
Randomize
