New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
Banned from zoo.
Again?
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Randomize