Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
