can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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