u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
I enjoy the company of your penis
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
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