I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
