Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
im having a threesome with these popsicles
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
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