I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize
