Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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