is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
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i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
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