For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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