If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
The feeling are messing with the penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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