brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
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