Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
Randomize
