He uses pillows to masturbate.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
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