You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
I think my greatest accomplishment today was probably using a bottle opener to get the cap off my fourth drink while holding the cat WITHOUT dropping him.
Oh god, what has my life become?
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
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