My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
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