That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
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