god i wish i could take a shit and a shower at the same time
ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
Randomize
