break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
As shirtless as possible
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Randomize
