just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
Randomize
