Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
Jerry, you need to find god
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
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