I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
Randomize