No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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