Plan B is the new Plan A
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Randomize
