I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I fell asleep on the toilet again last night...
omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
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