So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
Randomize