Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
I walked into a room this morning and someone asked how my back was because I apparently threw myself off the porch after attempting to set myself on fire. Who the fuck let drunk me play with fire?!
Better question: who the fuck planted a tree next to the porch?!
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
They are going to name an STD after you.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Randomize