the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
I made him laugh his dick is mine
you never un-have a 4some
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
I'm really sorry I called you a "smug, arrogant, boyfriend-fucking piece of defecation". I was super drunk.
I was going to be mad, but then I remembered you don't use autocorrect and spelled everything correctly and I was kinda impressed.
Randomize