I am in a vortex of obligation.
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
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