you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
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