That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
if i died would you start the facebook group?
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
Randomize
