'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch