Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
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