First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
