3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
literally had 100 drinks last night.
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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