I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize
