no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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