What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
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