Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
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you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
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It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
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