I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
It's really awkward to greet the pastor when I know I've licked chocolate syrup off his daughter's chest.
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
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