Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
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