I showed him my bush... on skype.
i can't believe i had my finger in that
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
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