Rock
Scissors
Fuck
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
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