I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
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