somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
This is the prime rib incident all over again
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
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