Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
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