I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Randomize
