dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
