Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heโs Upset Because People Told His Mom
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
Oh and itโs been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! ๐๐๐๐ฌ๐ณ๐
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