this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
